Not intended to be cruel.

I was watching TLC - The Learning Channel - last night.  I learn so much, like what not to wear, a home improvement project's value, how I should parent, the dynamics in a tattoo parlor, that no matter what our families look like in size or shape, we're all the same [screeeeeech]...

After watching TLC last night I was reminded of things for which I am thankful, that I am not.

1.  A Feral Child - Tarzan and Mowgli romanticize the notion of wild children.  As a kid it was adventurous and *fun* to think about living in the forest with bears, wolves or monkeys who loved and protected me.  I would have been Tarzan's Jane right after Michael Jackson's wife.  (Both fictional scenarios, little did I know.)  TLC has educated me.

2.  A Little Person - Because I loved The Wizard of Oz and hoped to live in Munchkinland someday, and my favorite aunt was extremely petite, I wanted to stop growing at the age of 8.  I desired to be a very small person.  The Roloff family amazes me.  I don't even see Matt Roloff as a Little Person - anymore.  He has that thick head of hair, a handsome, raspy voice, and a fine, fine, mind.  He's very appealing.  Watching them prepare for a trip, get in and out of cars, accomplish daily tasks we take for granted, move around their large property...  Again, TLC has educated me.

3.  A 750 pound Man - I was thankful I wasn't a 750 pound man before I watched TLC.

4.  A Conjoined Twin -  Forgive me.  I literally have had nightmares about this since I was a child.  I saw two women conjoined at the tops of their heads on The Phil Donahue Show my mother was watching when I was very young.  I'd never heard of two people being physically connected.  I thought their necks must be killing them.  Man.  They seemed relatively happy and if I remember correctly, they even had "relations" with men somehow.  On a serious note, it's miraculous when surgeons successfully separate conjoined twins.  If I however, was stuck to my sibling, I'd smack her all day long.  "Get off!"  TLC didn't educate me about the realities of this condition, but it reminded me to be grateful for my oneness.

I don't watch much television.  A little channel surfing during unwind time at night in bed, feels good.  If I'm watching a brainless, stupid humor show when Chris joins me in our room, he says, "What?  No surgeries, unsolved murders, tragic human conditions for us to watch?  You know how that puts me in the mood..."

Comments

[Corbie]

When I am watching a brainless, stupid humor show when Robert joins me in our room, he says, "What? No soft porn for us to watch? You know how that puts me in the mood..."

[Kate]

Conjoined twins have always upset me as well. I know that when you don't know any other life - you don't feel the panic of "get her off of me!" But that's the feeling I get when I think of it.

I like to think that Peter Dinklage's role in the Station Agent would change the way that people view Little People - but the truth is that the real assholes of the world either wouldn't watch it or wouldn't get it. Not that this has much to do with the Roloffs' show...but kind of.

[Csquaredplus3]

Corbie - different strokes...

Kate - Haven't seen "The Station Agent" but it looks good. I REALLY don't watch much TV and haven't seen many movies in the past 10-15 years. Dorky Dorkington here.

[ALF]

I am also thankful that I am not any of those things. I'm also thankful that I'm not a 750 pound woman.

[Jack]

TLC is always good for something, be it blogging or watercooler talk.

[Csquaredplus3]

ALF - me too.

Jack - yep. thanks for returning Jack.

[Punk Rock Dad]

"the dynamics in a tattoo parlor"

What TLC is showing is not how "Normal" parlors run or act. Those are some special, special people on those shows and not special in a overly complimentary kind of way.

[Jennifer]

TLC is great. Very rarely am I disappointed and I learn alot and remember to thankful for my life.

Thanks for sharing your piece of the world and for the weightloss tips. I'd like to present you with an award. Please stop by my blog to collect the image to post onto your wonderful blog.

[Csquaredplus3]

Punk Rock Dad! I'm glad you're here. People - check him out - quick! So, not all parlors are like "Miami Ink"? We actually have a few friends who are artists and have expressed similar opinions. They will applaud you...as do I.

Jennifer - Thank you very much - I'll be by. I don't understand the whole blog/award thing, but I'm truly flattered and humbled.

[San Diego Momma]

I've dubbed TLC, The Lookyloo Channel, because there's always something on it that you shouldn't watch, but do anyway.

Also: Station Agent was GREAT!

[All Adither]

Aww, we don't get TLC. I think I'm seriously missing out.

[Da Goddess]

Station Agent is one of my favorite movies ever! I'll even admit to my massive crush on Peter Dinklage. I kinda like Matt Roloff, too, but he has Amy and blah blah blah. Last year, as I was in the process of moving, I could have sworn I saw Jeremy and his girlfriend walking up the street by my old place. But it couldn't have been them. Nobody goes to that part of RB. Really. Nobody. Not on vacation anyway. Seriously.

You want a fun tattoo parlor? There's one down on 5th Ave in San Diego by my ex's former attorney's office. After I dropped off papers once, Little Dude and I walked into this totally old school place and marveled at all the different shark tats he could someday not get.

The conjoined twin thing: the ones who really make me sad are the teenage girls they always show. Like it's not hard enough to be a teenager already? You sort of don't want your sister going everywhere with you. I dunno, it seems like a very difficult life, but then again, it's all they know, right?

By the way, you forgot to mention having EIGHT kids. I love Jon & Kate. And I'm a little obsessive about things being clean, but not like Kate. Sometimes I just want to go to her house and lightly rub dirt everywhere. You know, just to prove nobody will get sick and die from a little dirt.