Minutia

"Blogging has become so popular that all meaning has been lost. People call themselves 'writers,' and ramble on about nothing, as if the minutia of their lives are as important as the big issues of the day, the tragedies that confront us all.

Which brings me to my story of the shower curtain." - Neil Kramer

This was how Neil from Citizen of the Month started a recent post. I love it. Neil continues the post and tells a story about something as simple as replacing a moldy shower curtain. It's entertaining and funny. Neil's a real writer though. He can write well about anything and it makes the rest of us look like we're writing a sixth grade essay. [Although I don't believe it's his intention to make anyone feel inferior. He's supportive of the individuality of bloggers. He's the "Citizen of the Month"!]

I struggle with how much minutia to include in blogging. Blogs that are well written interest me and like Neil's, I'll read a variety of content by a blogger who's writing style I admire. If I haven't been hooked by a blogger in some way [the writing, the photographs, the recipes, a personal friend who I love regardless of what they publish], and the blog is purely a ramble of daily events, with too-frequent postings, I lose interest. It's like listening to someone whine at length on the phone, and you tap your receiver to make it sound like your other line is beeping — Sorry. I don't mean to be rude but that's my other line and I really need to take it. Catch ya later!

This brings me to my story of the cleanse. [I understand if your phone's ringing, or there's someone at your door. Go handle it.]

Chris and I have been struggling with cravings for foods that aren't good for us [more than we typically do]. We've also wanted to lose a few pounds that are hanging on like baby opossums. We know the benefits of eating more fruits, vegetables and whole grains - organic whenever possible. We've read John Robbins Diet for a New America and May All Be Fed, as well as many other books encouraging vegetarian and earth friendly food choices. We still grab handfuls of cinnamon bears, chug coffee, and troll the pantry for refined snacks.

We started The Master Cleanse yesterday. We'll be ending it today.  You're supposed to do it for 10 days or longer. The basic theory of a cleanse is that a person takes great care in cleansing the outside of the body, but rarely if ever cleans the inside of the body, therefore an internal cleanse is a good thing. [So "they" say.] This cleanse involves drinking a lemonade made with purified water, lemons, maple syrup and cayenne pepper—I'm sure many of you have heard of it.

A part of any cleanse is eliminating. "They" say we shouldn't  stir up the dust [toxins] then let it settle somewhere else. It should leave the body.

Yesterday morning and this morning Chris and I did the "salt water flush" portion of The Master Cleanse. We followed the instructions and dissolved two teaspoons of sea salt in a quart of warm, purified water, and drank it. "They" say this will thoroughly cleanse the digestive tract. "We" say, buy the best toilet paper you can afford if you ever choose to do this.

The jury's still out on the effectiveness of our cleanse project. We have both sufficiently eliminated. I'm hungry, but I must admit I'm craving a bowl of steamed vegetables, and beans sound good. I thought I'd want a cheeseburger and a beer. I was tired yesterday and today my energy level feels normal. I'm leaving to run errands soon.

I took a photo of Chris with his laptop and his lemonade this morning. He was in his pajamas and had a healthy, post-elimination glow. He doesn't want me to share it. Too much minutia, he says.

Comments

[Connie @ Young and Relentless]

Why is the cleanse only lasting two days? I've considered doing a cleanse but I can't make it three hours without a mountain dew. With all my years of fast living, I'd be afraid to find out what kind of elimination might happen.

[Rachel Cotterill]

I'm not a big fan of detoxes - I like my toxins, thank you very much! ;) Lemonade, on the other hand... I'm a big fan of homemade lemonade :)

[christy]

I've never heard of this one, but it doesn't sound like fun - though, I'm sure 'fun' isn't really the point at all. The photo of the book on the t.p. roll really cracked me up! I don't think I've ever craved a bowl of vegetables - my hat is off to you for that alone!

[jessica]

People in L.A. cleanse themselves several times a year. Did this one include Honey Nut Cheerios? If so, I think I might give it a try

[Mrs. D]

I think my bowels/insides are cleansed enough with normal bathroom visits, so I think I will pass on this one. lol. I don't think I could drink salt water anyway.

[Chris]

Connie - We're choosing to only do it for two days. We were originally going to cleanse for four - but we've lost our motivation. It's hard.

Rachel - I'm beginning to think I like mine too! (This isn't normal lemonade - it has cayenne pepper in it.)

Christy - It's been around since the 1970s.

Jessica - I'm sure cleansing is popular in L.A. If I find a Honey Nut Cheerios cleanse, I'll let you know AND do it with you.

Mrs. D. - The salt water almost made me throw-up.

[Neil]

Now, a story about a shower curtain is crowd-pleasing. A story about a cleanse - well, I give you props for taking the chance!

[Kate Coveny Hood]

I love how Neil always talks about getting back to "writing" (regardless of the subject matter). It's a valid point since so many bloggers like to consider themselves "writers."

And the only thing that I've ever done that comes close to a "cleanse" was a very gross attempt to get my week late Oliver to be born already. I don't think any cleanse beats a castor oil cocktail. Gross - but effective. Too bad I wasn't trying to lose weight to fit into that Oscar dress.

[Lady Fi]

Love Citizen of the Month!

Oh - now a healthy post-elimination glow with few possums hanging off you in the form of pounds/kilos is the kind of minutiae I WOULD like to see! ;-)

[the mama bird diaries]

I definitely tend to shy away from the term "writer." It seems to have lost all meaning.

[debbie]

I like my impurities lurking about inside my body where they belong:)

[Deidre]

My parents are big on trying different cleanses. My mom did one where she ate mung beans and rice ONLY for days...They are healthy and active 60+s so who knows?

[tysdaddy]

When I worked in radio, we used to have this one guy who advertised a "cleansing" product on his show. It aired as a short infomercial at the beginning of his program, and the good doctor went on and on about how much fecal matter is bound up in our innards.

Of course, the show aired during the lunch hour . . .

[Judg]

I tried it last week and couldn't even make it to lunch. I like chewing too much.

[Sherri]

I think all of the cleanses are crap. I have Crohn's and spend most of my time shitting- the fact that people would do diets, drink things, etc to "cleanse" themselves makes me ill. It's sort of like the Atkins Diet. That dude was CLINICALLY obese when he died and yet people see the word "diet" [just like the word "cleanse"] and go for the quick fix.

No offense to you, of course. I just don't get it. At all.

PS: I love that guy's blog.

[Jannie Funster]

You have one of those well written blogs.

I loved the self deprecating humor in the quoted paragraph.

And very creative photo!

I suppose I'll try that cleanse, tho the cayenne pepper will be hard to take. I have such a bland palate. Love mashed potatoes and cheese puffs, yikes.

[Da Goddess]

Dare I tell you why this particular cleanse isn't healthy?

Most of these cleanses are really not healthful choices, with this one being amongst the worst. Essentially, you're throwing yourself into ketosis. Stay on a cleanse long enough and you can go into ketoacidosis. And since you never know what your threshold is, you run the risk of going into a ketoacidotic coma. Some sites claim fasting/cleanses cannot lead to ketoacidosis, but this particular cleanse can because of the level of sugar in the syrup.

The salt water? Also a bad idea. Salts are meant to be taken in small amounts to help keep your body fluids balanced. You need salts to stay where they are so that your body functions properly. A radical shift can lead to heart, cognitive, and other problems.

Just sayin'. It's the nurse in me. I know what can happen.

[Jennifer]

My blog is full of minutia. I guess I should not only do a physical cleansing but a blogger one too. But whatever, I enjoy minutia and comfort food.

Glad to hear you're not cleansing for a full week, self torture adverted.

[Cheri @ Blog This Mom!]

I spoke with a friend who'd done this cleanse and he lost twelve pounds from a frame that didn't look like he could lose twelve pounds and stay standing. He said he was wiped out from it. My point? I don't know. I guess to say that I've heard of this.

I think I'd be suicidal on day one, homicidal on days two through nine and a corpse on day ten. But I sort of want to try it. I mean, cleansing is like decluttering, right?

Don't spare the minutia, tell us how it goes.