Who's Counting?
Tuesday, October 12, 2010 I'm beginning to lose count. It was either my 28th, but possibly only my 27th, moving violation.
People gasp, wonder how I continue to drive legally and ask me how much my insurance costs. It's not that bad. Over a 28-year time period, I've received tickets in a handful of states and have watched the total leap when I've been at fault in a non-injury accident... or four. Did you know a person can receive multiple tickets in ONE accident? I learned this when I was 18.
NOTE: It's important for me to remind people that alcohol has never been a factor in any of my moving violations. As a matter of fact, I only recall one ticket occurring at night and it was a [w]reckless driving ticket [I wasn't even speeding]. I was on my way to my then boyfriend's [now husband's] apartment, and became distracted because a bug the size of a small bird was flying around the cockpit of my car. The police officer pulled me over -- something about erratic driving -- helped me get the bird-bug out of my car, then ticketed me. He sympathized when I said I was afraid the bug would get caught in my hair, but told me I should have immediately pulled over and battled the bug on the side of the road
The 28th, but possibly 27th, moving violation occurred in July. Middle Boy and I were in Colorado for a week so he could attend a daily music camp. I was driving to the hotel after dropping him off one morning, chatting with my mother-in-law on my HANDS FREE DEVICE, driving with the flow of traffic [I think], when I saw flashing lights in a side view mirror.
"Oh my gosh! I think I'm being pulled over. I don't even know what I'm doing wrong," I said to my mother-in-law.
The police officer was on a motorcycle, noticed me noticing him in my rearview mirror and pointedly gave me the "PULL OVER!" sign with his hand. He almost jerked himself off his motorcycle motioning so wildly.
I was offended.
"I need to go," I said to my mother-in-law. "He's huffy."
I gave the police officer the JUST-A-MINUTE sign with my hand followed by the I'M-ON-THE-PHONE sign [resembles the "hang loose" sign], and politely wrapped up the conversation with my mother-in-law.
I probably shouldn't have done that.
The police officer was a small person. Literally. The two of us together might have weighed 225 with my weight contributing more than his to the total. Although, he did have that big gun.
I drive a mid-sized SUV. The officer was not amused when I used his mirrored sunglasses to fix my bedhead, and I don't think he appreciated it when I apologized for not noticing him on his little motorcyle. He said, "I've been trying to pull you over for quite some time."
"Well, I am SO sorry. I was on the phone with my mother-in-law, and we hadn't spoken in a while. We're trying to coordinate dinner plans for my son. And I didn't see the little motorcycle."
He asked me all the usual questions. I said all the usual stuff. No, I didn't know I was speeding. Yes, I realize it's dangerous. I'm sorry. I have no business behind the wheel of a car. I'll be more careful and pay attention. I'm an idiot. Are points shared between states, yet? Thank you, Officer.
I drive legally. My insurance is a little on the high side, although not as high as one would think. I have a few photo radar tickets [I don't think those should count.] and the majority of my speeding tickets are for slightly over the limit.
I simply get caught when I break the rules, even unintentionally. Always have. Snitching cookies, sneaking out, skipping school, accidentally speeding or changing lanes too quickly [who knew?]... busted. I view my bumbling criminal abilities as life's way of watching out for me. I've been spared.
So my ticket history is shameful. I'm aware. But, I've only had one cavity in my life. That should count for something.
Reader Comments (30)
Five accidents. Three of them in a six month period. In all three of those, the other drivers were ticketed. In one of those, I hired a personal injury attorney.
The other two accidents? I was a passenger. Last thing I said to the driver before impact: "What the hell are you doing?" Then I watched as they turned into the path of a tractor trailer.
Needless to say, I don't like to drive and I don't like to ride. Being a "good" driver has kept my record spotless but hasn't kept me safe.
I've been pulled over three times in my life. Once the year I turned 16 and got my license, for passing illegally on the right. The cop was a jerk and wanted to also give me a ticket b/c I hadn't seen the sign.
The second time a couple of years later, and I don't even remember why. I do remember that I got out of it - I was wearing a bikini on my way home from the pool in my convertible. Shameless flirted with him!
The third time was just this summer. Both kids were screaming. I was on my handsfree device, and I had NO IDEA why he pulled me over. I was going under the limit. The officer asked me if I knew why I was pulled over. I said no. He said, your cars registration expired. OVER a year ago! Oops! He asked for my license. I handed it to him. ALSO expired. Two months prior. Then he noticed my emissions inspection sticker on my windshield. Expiring THAT DAY. I kid you not. But both kids were screaming, I was almost in tears, pleading with him not to throw me in jail I am a nursing momma not sleeping thru the night, normally so on top of these things, yada yada. It worked - I got off with just one ticket, and a three hour visit to the local DMV that afternoon to get a new license, inspection and registration docs. UGH!
Anyway, I feel your pain. I do really. Go eat some sugar you cavity free lucky duck you!
wreckless driving = good.reckless driving = bad.
Ahhh! That's great! Now I want to correct it in the post... spell check didn't catch it, and I doubt most people know the Urban Dictionary's definition of "reckless" misspelled [which is exactly what I did... no clever word usage, just an ignoramous error]. I heart you, Claire! Sorry about the insurance situation for your son. Ouch!
To: chrisyross@msn.com
I so love you for the fixing the hair in the sunglasses also!!!! lol xoxo
I've been pulled over multiple times but never gotten a ticket (knock on wood). And I never had to cry to get out of it, they all just let me go with a warning!
I sickened myself. Respect for the law sure but I was repulsive...
I actually hope our boys are dorky and bumbling like me if they're going to try to be ornery at all. I want them popped for the small stuff!
I LOVE that your ticket-free record is two years. When Parke was six, he told me I deserved a treat because I hadn't been pulled over by a policeman in such a long time.
What? He didn't appreciate you using his glasses as a mirror?? The nerve.
You make me laugh with your words and spirit, Chrissy Ross - -I love that.
And must soon fashion you an exquisite sidebar button to reflect your wonderfulness, but it will pale in comparison to you, of course.
xoxo
xoxo