Rainy days and Mondays always get me down. So does watching old home movies...

It's Monday, and it's raining.  Oldest Boy had a hard time getting up this morning so I sang The Carpenter's song to him.  Funny, it didn't help.

Chris spent time over the weekend transferring old Hi8 tapes to our computer.  [We recently converted to Macs and the easy, intuitive part hasn't kicked in yet for me.  I use this large-screened, high-powered computer like a $500 PC.  I don't know what I'm doing.]  The tapes transferred in real time and were displayed on the computer screen during the process.  We all enjoyed checking out what was playing throughout the weekend.  Oldest Boy couldn't take his eyes off himself.

Watching footage from 9-12 years ago left Chris and me both feeling...  unique.  Not good and not bad.  It's intense.  I enjoy watching video of recent events, but the emotions that accompany viewing life when significant time has passed - are heavy.

I saw my grandfather, who's now deceased.  And my grandmother, who's physically and cognitively deteriorated.  It was almost too much.  Too much feeling.  I wanted to jump into the computer - to go back - and at the same time, look away. 

Watching the births (not literally - I was opposed to the actual birth being filmed) of Oldest and Middle Boy left me stirred.  Seeing glimpses of our life 10 years ago was conflicting.  The scenes captured were happy and cute, but I remember the moments when I was less patient, uptight about unimportant things, and I want the opportunity to right those.  I know Mother and Mamaw would both say, "Honey, I understand."

I just spoke with Em on the phone. (She's a dear fleshly friend who is NOT jealous of my bloggy friends - is that better Em?)  Her father passed away much too young a few years ago.  She said it's hard to watch video of her dad, but she finds comfort in it too.  We concluded that maybe the more we view images, the confusing, intense emotions will soften.  I don't know...

If I knew how to pull a few seconds of the transferred data in iMovie to imbed in my post, I would.  If it wasn't a rainy Monday, I bet I could figure it out.

 

We're all feeling a little melancholy today.  Dumb Carpenters.

Comments

[Dr Zibbs]

I must admit. The Carpenters are a guitly pleasure for me. If you tell anyone I'll deny it.

[Robin]

Karen Carpenter always makes me want a sandwich.Love, Robin (fleshy friend who is not jealous of and understands bloggy friends :)

[Joe Girl]

Girl, you and I are cut from the same cloth, I swear. This post really struck a chord in me. Some days you just *want*, and/or *need* to be a sentimental (emphasis on 'mental') basket case. It's O-KAY. ;) Especially if it's a rainy Monday.

Now you need to watch a really funny, stupid-silly movie. I recommend anything with Will Ferrell or Steve Martin.

[Kate Coveny Hood]

I experience nostalgia as a simultaneous shot of euphoria and sucker punch to the gut. And my babies were in fact babies "just yesterday." I don't know what I'll do 10 years from now...but I think tears will be involved.

[Jessica Bern]

Okay, I'm crying, are you happy? LOL my daughter was given a bunny rabbit that, when you turn the key, the tune of this song plays over and over. She got it when she was born 5 years ago and I would like with her and softly sing the song to her and, well, I gotta go. I need a tissue.

[Sherri]

Aww, that's a sweet and perfect photo to go along with this post. It's okay to be melancholy.

[merlotmom]

Damn those Carpenters! A little melancholy is okay as long as it doesn't last too long. I agree with your other friend, a little Steve Martin would be just the thing. Also, thanks for being there for my "appearance" and for your kind words. MUCH appreciated.

[Mrs.D]

I cry watching our home videos. It makes me realize how much time has slipped through my fingers like sand.

Is that a cat by the door? Or a dog?

[csquaredplus3]

Dr. Zibbs - You're secret's safe here.

Robin - THAT'S funny! She makes me want a sandwich too.

Joe Girl - Will Ferrell and Steve Martin are both excellent suggestions. Reno 911 makes me laugh too...

Kate Coveny Hood - That's a perfect description of nostalgia! It's the ultimate yin-yang.

Jessica - Of course I'm not happy if you're crying. Get RID of that rabbit! That's a torture toy.

Sherri - Thank you. I appreciate your compassion. (Does everyone see how NICE Sherri is?)

Merlot Mom - I know you're busy with school and writing and life, so I humbly thank you for visiting MY blog.

Mrs. D. - Does Mary our DOG, really look like a cat in that picture? I'm a neat-freak, germaphobe. A shedding cat with a litter box in the house would be a challenge for me. I know you love your felines - it's MY issue - cat's are GREAT!

[vodkamom]

Listening to that song tugged at my heart. I had to listen to it twice. I remember saying to my son when he was in kindergarten that I needed a machine that would keep him young. He responded by saying I should "get right on that" because he was growing fast. Truer words were never spoken.

Hope the sun comes out.

[we_be_toys]

Listening to the Carpenters is kind of like watching old home movies, to me. Sometimes when I get taken back into the past I have trouble not feeling claustrophobic when I try to come back into the present again. And yet, I spend a big chunk of my time in the past, only it's the past of others, so while I feel melancholy, I can still breathe.As my sister and I would say, tis the season for brooding on the past and feeling blue. Some years I can put if off until January, but this year it's been all up in my Koolaid since August. Neat, huh?But maybe, maybe by January I'll be back up and peppy?And yeah, Karen Carpenter always makes me hungry, like somehow if I eat for her, it'll all be okay.(No, no, I'm not a basketcase today - why do you ask?)

[Connie @ Young and Relentless]

Crap. Now I'm crying too.

I have a video from my first wedding and one of my Grandmother demonstrating how to make Lefse that I need to find and transfer to DVD. They are somewhere in my basement.

You have inspired me to find them!

[Sherri]

Is there a debate on whether or not I'm nice? If so, please make sure everyone knows I am nice. On every third Thursday of the month. That's when I take the day off from rolling old ladies.

[Bobbi Olson]

No one likes it when I sing to them either, so weird.

Adorable picture at the end with the boy and his dog. I love it!

[San Diego Momma]

I always wished the Carpenters and Barry Manilow would do a duet. I unabashedly love both.

Neil? Eh.

[csquaredplus3]

Vodka Mom - What a nice comment. Wouldn't it be nice if we could control time? Thanks.

We Be Toys - You don't sound like a basketcase. Sorry it's been a rough few months for you. Have a sandwich - it might help.

Connie - Oh no! Don't cry - not my intent. Find your videos though. That's important.

Sherri - Thank you for helping any doubters see the LUV and COMPASSION in you that I've seen. (On Sherri's day off, I fill in for her.)

Bobbi - Thanks for seeing Mary as a dog and not a cat. I've finally connected the dots that you're Connie's sister. We gotta find you a MAN!

San Diego Momma - I like them too. Maybe not unabashedly, but I admire your transparency.